THE OPEN NOTEBOOK

This project is a creative risk (what if noone writes in? I have no control over the engagement I may get..). This space allows for longer form conversation, off social media, and you can be completely anonymous.

I’ve opened up this space to for the following:

• pondering on the creative process

• questions about creative practice, or things you might want to know about my art practice

• sharing your own experiences with creativity, delight, joy, whimsy, play, art making

• ideas or experiences related to meaning making, faith, religion, spirituality

• curiosity

  Writing in a submission implies your consent for this to be published on this page, along with my response to it.

  #8:Accountability buddy

“Alone we stand

Together we grow.

Life is never still.

Holding hands we dive.

Let’s see where we go…”

-Jacqui

Hi Jacqui!

So pleased to see you here!

I agree. I am a bit singular in my thinking sometimes, and in making art, hence this is a challenge. Standing alone is sometimes more familiar and comfortable but you never find out what’s in the water if you don’t dive in, right?

x

#7: How do you (or do you) define the difference between inspiration and holy spirit’s direction?

-Faye

Hey Faye!

Such a cool question.

Early in my drawings, I used to draw a little figure on a ladder in my images (who was never an ‘obvious’ character that I consciously chose, he was just there…), I referred to him as the “Maintenance Man” who showed up in my work without my explicit artistic choice or narrative.

After a few years, I realised it was my representation of how the Holy Spirit functions in both my life and my art: quietly painting the background, bringing a little toolkit of grace and comfort with him. He is ever present and ever comforting.

My friend, who is a Christian academic, co-wrote a paper with me last year about my art, including this character, and part of that paper reads:

“In Jn. 14.26, Jesus describes the Holy Spirit as parakletos, variously translated as the ‘Advocate’ (nrsvue, niv), ‘Helper’ (esv, nkjv), or ‘Comforter’ (kjv).57 David Ford suggests that this description of the Holy Spirit invites readers deeper ‘into the life, love, and glory of God as their true home’, abiding in the mutual indwelling of Father, Son, and Spirit.’ Sawrey’s expression of The Maintenance Man depicts her understanding and experience with the Holy Spirit as always working, ever- present, gentle, and comforting” (Sawrey & Austin, 2025).

So I guess my answer is firstly, when I gave myself over to God, I invited the Holy Spirit to guide me (including a power struggle over my art practice, to be honest, and then consciously giving my art practice to this higher authority, too). I believe he’s ever present with me even when I don’t draw him in my art. He’s painting the background forever.

I also think ‘inspiration’ is hard to define, isn’t it? Creative inspiration is kind of a spark of intrigue or interest that you have to sit with and commit to for an entire piece of art. It comes, and goes. It’s GREAT when it shows up. I think my distinction is that inspiration can be hard to find, temporary, and more of a fleeting emotional experience of excitement, in contrast to the Holy Spirit who doesn’t waver.

I’m interested in what you think?

x

#6

“Happy to connect, create and explore where I am going this year. I love what you have created here. I am enjoying the curvy lines in your 'setting sun of time' and the 'journey' of the little minute hand as it appears to have left the safety of the rigid confines of the 'clock'“

-Helan

Hi Helan,

I’m delighted you’re here! Yes, this clock is definitely not conforming to the usual rules of what a clock would traditionally look like. I drew it before I got my first submission here, in that ‘waiting’ space, and was a bit nervous that no one would come and engage. Aren’t we all waiting, at different times, for different things? The clock is a recurring symbol in my work which is usually dealing with that idea. Happily, for the Open Notebook, I didn’t wait too long. Please feel free to stop by and share any ideas or ponderings you have this year!

x

Re: #5 A Poem I Wrote At 3am. Tell Me Your Thoughts Please?

“Thank you for opening this platform with the option to be anonymous.. it makes it much less scary to share.  
And thank you for your feedback. 

Your point of contention made me giggle because I purposely used the word listen to His rules instead of follow as my Dad always said I don’t want you to listen to my rules I want you to follow them. So my intention was more so the guided love, my Mom’s “rules” were more so the guided love. 

In learning and truly believing this, how could anyone not follow Him? 
I heard an analogy today: If you were to be offered a loan from a bank, but the debt had already been paid. Would you not spend the money? 

Each day I am learning more about His grace and what He has done for us, His children and I have never felt so unconditionally loved before in my life. 

Thank you for your time and response ❤️”

Dear Anonymous,

I like that analogy a lot. You should keep expressing your experience of this unconditional love in poetry or in ways that highlight the beauty of that analogy for people.

x

#5 A poem I wrote at 3am. Tell me your thoughts please?

“What if the man on the moon is Jesus? 
What if the man on the moon is Jesus and he watches over his world at night? 
What if the sun is a pun and the Son watches in the day too?
What if he was the light of the world before anyone met the Redeemer?
What if he was there all along and we just never knew? 
What if the turmoil and destruction was always meant to happen? 
What if the plan, and the sin was always in view? 
What if the choice, the apple, Eve, the snake was the outcome He always knew? 
It would mean He created us simply to love us, not a chance, not two. 
Unconditional, always forgiving always for me and always for you. 
He just wants you to choose Him, to listen to His rules. 
Because he knows us better than we know us. 
He loves us more than we can fathom, as parents always do. 
He just wants us to love Him and for us to want Him too.”

Hi anonymous,

Thanks for sharing your poem. It can be nerve wracking sharing your work with others and anxiously waiting for feedback. Sometimes I actively avoid asking for constructive feedback on my work so you might be braver than me.

Your poem gets to the essence of what we all ask: what if, and why? It seems to be a very human impulse to ask these things. My favourite things about this poem are:

-You’ve actually got some solid theological undercurrents in there which I enjoy in art, and which I find is often missing in post modern art especially (original sin, atonement, redemption, the nature of God- is he personal or and unknowable force? etc)

-I think my only contention would be with the word ‘rules’- sure, there are ‘rules’ but that may imply an easy formula of ‘if I just DO the things I’ll be safe’ instead of the endlessly more complex Christian idea that “even IF I DON’T or CAN’T DO the things (because I’m a flawed human) He loves me anyway” - the slight difference allows grace for exactly when we can’t possibly follow the rules. I’d be interested in your thoughts on that.

Maybe you mean rules in more of a ‘loving boundaries’ sense eg. There are guardrails for our good, and I completely agree if that’s the sense you were getting at.

My challenge back to you, is this: So, what if? What if all of that is true? What if God redeems, oversees all things, and offers unconditional love? How will you respond to it?

x

The Open Notebook: First Edition

Feb 8, 2026.

Without further ado, here are the first submissions and my responses:

#1: Seeing personalities as colours"

“Seen a post you did once, where you said you see colours as numbers ( i think it was numbers) and how musicians can see music as rhythm and colours... 
This peaked my interest, because i see people, personalities and emotions as colours (auras if you will). As i got older and understood it better, It has changed the way i see the world, the way i see and interact with people. 
I can only put it down to a gift of discernment, but it shows to me through colours.

Certain colours to me associate with " Good person/ Bad person/ Honesty/ dishonesty / Kindness/ Strength / Love and strong emotions type of vibes. 

Just a small encounter with someone will give them a “colour” or even “colours". Its kind of personality traits or in-time emotional responses. I feel like i walk around in a world of iridescent people. I'd be really interested to see how you would draw/paint that. Might make for some cool artwork.  My creative process is through physical objects arranging, grouping, colour matching. Almost OCD like, in a world full of colourful people (in my eyes) grouping and keeping colours, shapes and objects together and similar create a sense of calm in my mind.  Weird, huh!”

-Anonymous

Hi, Anonymous.

You were the very first person to write in and it made my whole day to read your thoughts. I have been pondering them since.

Yes, I have written and talked about synesthesia, a sensory condition you can read more about here. For me, it’s primarily that I see days of the week, numbers, letters and months all very visually with set colours that don’t change over time (Tuesday, September, and the number 8 are all yellow and I will not accept otherwise, lol).

Your experience is really fascinating to me. There was one line you wrote that jumped right out at me straight away, which was this:

“I feel like i walk around in a world of iridescent people.”

What a beautiful phrase, and concept. I haven’t got set ideas myself about seeing what you’re describing as ‘auras’, and I have never experienced that, but I love that you mentioned this might be like a real-time emotional response to people, only instead of feeling it, you have almost an extra-sensory visual experience of it too.

I wonder, if you read this and wanted to write back in response about the following:

-Can you give me an example of the sorts of colours you would associate with kindness, or truth, or a loving presence? (may or may not be for drawing idea purposes). Are there shapes or anything defined, or more a foggy undefined vibe?

-Does it get tiring to perceive people in such a multi-dimensional kind of way? Or it is kind of exciting to walk around the world like that?

-Do your first impressions/ first sense of someone’s ‘colour’ ever turn out to be incorrect, or is it almost like intuition where you trust it every time?

-Can you perceive colour for yourself? What is it?

Thanks so much for being the very first engager of this project, and for sharing your experiences.

#2: Abstraction Vs. Realism

“Hi Alana. Lani. I love the bright colours in your work and the idealised forms. This sort of work brings me joy. That is why I like naive art. I discovered abstracting forms gave me the opportunity to bring meaning into my art without the stress of trying for perfect realism. Do you find that too?”

-Lyndell

Hi Lyndell,

Thanks for appreciating the vividness of the colours, I use pencils that I press into oblivion on the page to achieve that brightness.

I really admire realists and find that I would make an absolutely hopeless one. I found in previous attempts that the time spent gridding up a page, working from a photo, and focussing on the tiny details and accuracy completely took the joy of spontaneous creativity out of the picture. It felt too mathematical for me. I think maybe some art borders more on maths, on precision, and has much less to do with that completely reckless joyful creative process. Maybe that is a cynical take coming from someone who doesn’t have the patience for it. So, my rationale has become ‘if I can’t draw a lifelike eye, why not draw one tiny and one HUGE just to play with scale and hoodwink everyone into thinking that was always the plan’

So far, I think this approach has worked well.

As for meaning, I am more interested in representing complex, esoteric or curious ideas in symbolic ways than trying to perfect a still-life of fruit. It sounds like you’ve found freedom in the more abstract approach too, and I hope you keep finding time to have space for the joy of abstraction.

#3 Fostering Creativity In Kids

“How can we encourage our kids to spend more time being creative when schools can be the opposite?” -Anonymous

Hi, anonymous. This is a really tough one. I am not a parent, so I wonder how qualified I am to answer, but I have been a child, and I have somehow never severed that fragile thread of imagination and play that is crucial to development and remains intact in me from my own childhood. I am going to reach into the recesses of my memory to answer.

What opened the space for me to find delight in creativity as a child was actually the following:

• BOUNDARIES!

  My parents provided strong boundaries. In my experience, creativity was not born of chaos or anarchy, but within the confines of a coherent world that made sense and had a context. As a child, I felt safe, secure, and understood the authority of my teachers and parents (meaning: I was a compliant student who respected teachers and followed rules) and once I realised my place in the world, I felt free to create and explore my own little universes through stories, poems and drawings. But I needed those clear edges, I needed defined borders to my world, which is something only adults can provide. My parents didn’t actively enter my imaginative world and encourage it (from memory, they could say “if you’re bored go eat an apple” so I typically played with my siblings independently). Despite this, their boundaries and love as parents were essential ingredients for my imagination to feel safe enough to flourish.

• A TEACHER BELIEVING IN ME.

  A grade one teacher gifted me a big sketchbook and believed in me when i was 6. One teacher saw my enjoyment of creativity and her belief in me went a long way (on that, think we should pray for our teachers; they face pressures that they haven’t always, but have the position to speak life and encouragement into young people. What a powerful spot to be in).

• READING BOOKS

  I was a big nerd of a kid who was taken to the local council library regularly by my parents and borrowed the maximum books every time. I was even a library monitor at school. I was a NERD. I read at the dinner table, I read every spare second. I soaked up stories and this had the twin results of improving my grammar and making english as a subject pretty easy at school, and it also taught me that there were experiences and worlds beyond my own. My dad read Narnia to my siblings and I as kids, and that alone opened up an entire world to me.

• OUTDOOR INDEPENDENT PLAY

  We lived in a quiet cul-de-sac and used to play outside with the neighbourhood kids. Playing games, negotiating roles, not having parents RIGHT THERE intervening to solve all our problems, and having a largely blissful device free childhood. Now that I am reflecting, I think maybe this is becoming a lost rare experience.

  So, anonymous, I would say: school can be brilliant, AND also, not every kid fits the mold, the schedule and the format. Maybe for some, helping them get through the necessary difficulties of school (the structure, the style of learning, etc) is a task in itself. And outside of that, reading to your kids, promoting their own time to read, allowing off-device outdoor play time, giving them space for independent play with other kids so they can negotiate and build resilience…all the essential ingredients I found useful in my own upbringing.

  I hope this helps. x

#4 "Following up: Seeing personalities as colours"

“Thank you for such great insight and perspective in your response! I love that you were able to share insight of synesthesia! 
I have some responses to your questions, I’d love to hear your thoughts on:
• No sort of patterns or shapes, this is a colour only response.
Think of the sun shining on a crystal wind chime and projecting 2-3 Iridescent colours, clear to see but subtle, One colour stands out more than the others... a background "glow" surrounding the person... that's what i see.
The colours i associate with people can be complex and confusing, 1 colour can mean different things.. During engagement/ conversation and afar observation i can usually make clear perspective of the meaning.
For example; 
-RED is the most confusing for me..
I perceive this as Aggression, Anger, Secrecy, Hurt, Lust, Passion
-BLUE ( light blue in particular) is my favourite! 
It shows to me Honesty, Truth, Calm , Peace, Kindness
-ORANGE appears as Happiness, Complexity and Confusion. 
-GREY- Is a colour that i stay cautious and weary of always, i tend to stay clear and keep encounters very short.

• Does it get tiring?
Yes!!! Mostly confusing, i still question myself constantly...
After so many years its a learned trait to either zone in or ignore so there is an "off switch" 
I generally keep personal interactions short because of this. But i adapt very well to my surroundings and generally all people. 
When i first meet or interact with somone. Seeing their colour(s) is predominantly uncontrollable, after that first encounter i don’t tend to see their colour(s) anymore, unless i kind of concentrate or zone into the person.

• Do these colours turn out to be incorrect? 
The colours themselves no, never actually... but multi- meaning colours, i have interpreted wrongly before, yes. 
Over the years I've learnt to be more vigilant and observant during encounters, People show strong body language without realising, this makes sense of a multi-meaning colour for me.
Its almost like a fight or flight response i guess..
And is more of a knowing, than a feeling.

• Can i perceive a colour for myself? No, unfortunately. 
I also don't see children as a colour..?
I personally gravitate to the colours black, navy blue and beige/ brown..
These are colours that i don’t associate with "Personalities" or " Emotion".
I tend to wear these colours and they are predominantly the decor and furnishings of my entire home, where i like to feel rested, muted and grounded.. I find them peaceful and neutral, yet exciting because all other colours can be added to compliment, a sort of balance. 

2-3 colours is what most people generally show to me when i see them, but having a sense of organisation and controlled order to kind of "capture that into" is where i bring both my "Blessing & Curse" into a balance of creative understanding and comfortability.

-Anonymous

Hi Anonymous,

I found something you might find interesting! This article suggests seeing ‘auras’ or visually perceiving colours attached to people can be a form of synesthesia, too. It calls your experience “projective personality-colour synesthesia”

I hadn’t heard of that, have you?

It makes me reflect on the cleverness of our brains, and makes me admire the creator behind such complex designs. The fact that we all have such idiosyncratic ways of perceiving the world, some of which seem to be delightful and like little ‘brain quirks’ reminds me we just don’t know how the next person is walking around experiencing the world. How humbling.

Your ability to see the world this way sounds like a gift to me, maybe one that requires some managing and ordering. I wish for you that you continue to perceive such interesting things about people, in a way that feels calm and not overwhelming. I wish for you the ability to harness this in ways that serve you well and inspire your creativity.